Just me

' Don't worry, bout a thing, cause every little thing, is gonna be alrite.. '

Remember that? A song from Bob Marley which is used as a soundtrack of the movie I am Legend? Good song..

Anyways, I've got problems. You know, I often underestimate people.
I think I wrote it before, that I praise myself to high that I can't look down.
I'm a bad bad person.
If you don't know me, well, its just the matter of time that someone will find out how bad I am.

You know, I find people that stick around me very fascinating.
How can they even endure being near me? If I were those people, I really really can't be around myself.
I am loathsome. I should be hatred.

I wish I could be like Johny Gunther, Jr.
He suffered brain cancer but still lived his life blithely.
I wish I could do that, I'm trying to.

I want to be someone. No, I want to be something for someone.

I always considered myself as the forlorn one, but I am disgraceful of what I posses.
This post, is a verbose post. I am just selfish and inconsiderable. That's the point.

A Walk to Remember

Jamie and Landon


Have you ever read or seen the movie 'A Walk to Remember'?
Well, if you haven't, you should.

Its about a seventeen-year-old boy who fell in love with a girl.
But the girl had leukemia.
She used to dream of getting married in the same church her parents got married.
She dreamed of her dad walking her down the aisle,
then finally, gave her up to her lovely husband.
But it just seemed impossible.
She was just seventeen.
But this boy, came like a miracle to her,
he was so crazy about her, crazy in love, I mean.
They finally got married, when she was very sick.
She was so weak, that she and her father had to stop twice before reaching the altar.
That walk, along the aisle, with such an effort, was worth remembering.
That's why the story was called 'A Walk to Remember'.

'Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It does not take offense and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people's sins, but delights in the truth. It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes' - Corinthians.

Its a passage where the girl highlighted and wanted to show to the boy.
She was very kind and wise.
A character that no one shall beat or defeat of its greatness.
Nicholas Sparks is amazing and adorable.

Want to know more?
Visit this link
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0281358/


Amazed,
Devy Cendana

Unfortunate Friends and Me

I wanted to define the meaning, I want to decipher the unspoken feelings of having one.
But I can't. I never have one in my life, I mean, the true one, the one I can confide in.
No one has ever really share things with me.
Maybe I've been noticed, but not trusted.

I can gain people's trust to believe in me to handle things, to make things right.
But I can never ever make them know that I care.
All these years, I've been such a braggart.
That almost everyone have such a very uncomfortable feelings for me.

Back then, I didn't know.
Now, I think it's too late to fix it.
I know, never say too late, but it really is.
I wish I could go back to three years ago, and make everything goes better.

I have to move on, I know.
But there are certain points where I know that I am the one to blame,
but I praise myself too high that I couldn't find my way down.

I resent myself, for being selfish,
I am trying not to be,
but it's very hard, cause it already seemed like me.
Selfish, me, selfish, me,
seems like so connected, its like permanently curved in me.

I really am trying to change.
In every aspect.

Wish me luck..



Wishing myself luck,
Devy Cendana

Art of Life

"When there's no heart breaking, there will be no healing.
When there's no healing, there will be no learning.
When there's no learning, there will be no struggle.
And struggle is a part of life" - Lucas Scott, One Tree Hill.

I wonder, if we ended up sobbing, will we get better?
I mean, we have our self resilience, right?
For example, when you fail a subject, you will try harder, right?
Maybe you don't realize it, but there's something that mends your heart when it was broken.

I once had a problem, about understanding how human could be that fragile the same time he/she could be strong.
But I know that's the way it was supposed to be, right?
We get hurt, we be strong, and we'll be back to normal.

Many people don't realize of how they great they are.
Many people don't realize how special they are to people around them.

I always wanted to tell my friends,
how important they are to me, how I appreciate every moment I spent with them,
but I was too afraid of listening or seeing how will they react.
I'm afraid that it would disappoint me,
but it turns out that I lost them, that I can never hold on to them again.

I wanted to be indifferent, pathetic,
But I ended up knowing that everything was meant to be felt.
Even though by feeling it means hurting ourselves, but that's just the art of life, right?

Once again, inspired by Lucas Scott,
Devy Cendana